Taking Time

eve in progress detail 01Less posting, more art making. A couple of weeks ago I started to feel that I had made conflicting new year’s resolutions. One was to try to update my blog more with artworks, videos, and posts. The other was to make more art.

Soon I noticed that the harder I was working on updating my blog, the more time I was spending reading about other people’s lives, viewing the art they are making, and spending less time present in my own life making my own art. I realized pretty quickly that if I spend as much time making art as I do reading about other people making art, I would have enough artwork to start my own gallery and I wouldn’t be second guessing myself about whether or not I could ever “make it” being an artist full time. So…

I have stopped obsessively checking my email- except for work email while I am inside the school building.  I have stopped obsessively reading other people’s art blogs, or rather, I have seriously cut down- I think it is an addiction honestly. While I am reading and looking at photos of other people’s artworks, I feel inspired, and then, when I sit down to make my own work, I feel intimidated and start making excuses for myself. So- many more hours are free for me to work, and much less of my self confidence is being damaged by comparing myself and my own abilities to those of other artists online. I try to check in on only one or two sites a day, and the rest of my free time I spend working on various projects and enjoying time with my family.

Next step, less TV.

The best bonus so far is that I actually stuck to my Thursday after work artmaking day this week, which I had talked myself out of for weeks in a row. I spent a few hours working and I am thrilled at my sculpture so far- far more successful than I originally hoped- it’s one of the first pieces that I have worked on in a long time that I feel really proud of deep down- like my artgut is telling me I’m getting it right. It’s creepy and interesting and I am excited to see how I finish it- I sort of feel like I am watching myself create- like part of my self- my logical and critical part, has taken the backseat and is just letting the creative artistic self take over for a while. And I am happier. Even though I am fighting a cold and tired, I feel happier and more relaxed, right down to my core. I have to think, this is what it’s all about.

2 thoughts on “Taking Time

  1. “I sort of feel like I am watching myself create- like part of my self- my logical and critical part, has taken the backseat and is just letting the creative artistic self take over for a while.”

    I think this is a huge part of the creative process. Hopefully you can find a way to repeatedly return to that state.

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